Handmaid of the Lord

"I have not much to offer you...."

2009-07-26T15:02:00.000-07:00

In church this weekend we sang a song called "Unashamed." A lot of the song is very good, but it starts out with a line that I have a bit of a problem with. "I have not much to offer you, not near what you deserve." You see, the problem in our standing with God is not that we do not have much to offer Him. It is not as though God deserves a castle and all we have to offer is a doll-house. The problem, first of all, is that we don't have anything to offer God. Many people talk about only having their life to offer back to God. While they often rightly acknowledge that this life came form God in the first place, this too misses the point. Because we don't actually have life to offer God. Apart from Him we are dead in our sins and trespasses. We don't even have our life to offer to God. Before we can do that, God has to breath His life into us.

Of course, the problem gets even worse. It is not that we just don't have anything to offer God, but that we have stolen from Him. God deserves our undivided devotion, our complete obedience, our full allegiance. And yet we have turned our backs on Him. We have become devoted to the creature rather than the Creator, we give our obedience to the enemy of the Lord, and our full allegiance to ourselves. We have stolen the glory and honor that He alone deserves. And so when we come before God we cannot say..."I have not much to offer you," but must say, "I have nothing to offer you and I am eternally in debt." Only the grace of God grants us life and allows us to stand in His presence at all. And only His grace gives us that which we can then offer back to Him. I have nothing to offer Him. But He has given me everything!

A Couple Thoughts on Dualism

2009-04-15T15:56:00.000-07:00

Dualism keeps coming up in things I've been reading....CMA devotionals, Daviah's school. Dualism seeks to divide the world into two spheres and then pit them against each other. Of course, like any effective lie, this one has a grain of truth. The world is indeed divided into two warring factions. The problem with dualism is it draws the line between them in the wrong place: between the materiel and the physical, between sacred and secular. To the dualist the materiel world is at best completely unnecessary and at worst evil. Too often this creeps into Christianity. We view the people as "most spiritual" who have the least connection with the physical realm. We think the "best Christians" are those who devote themselves to "full-time ministry" or missions, etc. Of course, these views could also be called gnosticism and Saint Paul did a pretty good job refuting those who by seeking to deny their physical desires made no progress in godliness. There's a very simple reason for this: sin is not a disease of the physical world. It starts in our souls. Denying the material world may in reality make our sin problem worse. After all, most of us recognize fairly easily the sins of the body, but the spiritualized sins of the soul are much more subtle (and deadly). God has created the physical world and all its spheres. While we must never elevate them above the eternal, we are commanded to partake of the physical with thanksgiving and enjoyment. I love what Elizabeth Elliot said about it: "Christianity is not dualism. The body is not evil. Jesus Christ came down from heaven, was incarnate by the Holy Ghost, and was made man, thus forever sanctifying visible things. God is not looking for men and women who will learn to hate what He has made, but for those who will learn to love it as He loves it, as proceeding from Him and going back to Him." (Discipline: The Glad Surrender , pg 113). The earth is the Lord's and the fullness thereof. All of me, body, soul, and spirit, needs to be redeemed and remade into the image of God. All or reality, physical, non-physical, sacred, or so-called "secular" is under the Lordship of Jesus Christ. He must reign over it all!

Treasure in Heaven

2009-03-23T15:36:00.000-07:00

Yesterday my Dad preached on storing up treasure in heaven, so that's been on my mind yesterday and today. What does it look like to store up treasure in heaven? The obvious answer is to spend your time on that which is eternal: godliness, love, other people, etc. Ultimately, it is God's glory and His kingdom which last forever. Whenever our lives are a reflection of that glory and kingdom, we are laying up treasure in heaven. I think that part of what that means is that some element of whether we are storing up treasure in heaven depends on our heart and attitude. In other words, two people could do the exact same thing and one of them would be storing up treasure on earth, while the other stores up treasure in heaven.

For example, every day I eat meals. So do many other people who are living in rebellion against God. God has given this food out of His grace to provide for our needs and to remind us of His far more important provision of Spiritual sustenance in Christ. If a meal is eaten with a grateful heart and with a spirit open to the spiritual feeding on Christ then one is storing up treasure on earth, for while the food is far from eternal, the grace that it represents is eternal. Likewise, I may go into an art museum and admire a beautiful painting. If my admiration stops at the artwork itself I am probably storing up treasure on earth, for this painting will one day molder into nothing. However, if in admiring the painting I see the character of God put forth, His order and beauty, and adore that, then I am storing up treasure in heaven. The painting will not last forever, but the beauty of Christ it shines forth will. I want my every moment to be fixed on Christ and lived out of a deep love, adoration, and obedience towards Him. In this way I pray that all that I do, think, and say -from the most mundane to the most "spiritual"- would truly be building treasure in heaven.

I Shall Not Want

2009-03-21T09:09:00.000-07:00

It has been awhile since I last posted...somehow I don't feel like I have much to say that would be appropriate in this format. God has been teaching me so much about trusting Him lately. This past week I was kind of struggling with trusting and this morning God gave me these words: "The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want." They are perhaps overly familiar words, but powerful nonetheless. The Lord is my shepherd. That is all I need to know and there should be no room for fear or worry or want. Nothing else is needed. The Lord is my shepherd. He will care for me, provide for me, direct me, protect me. What else could I ask for? I shall not want.

The Problem of Evil

2009-02-27T14:42:00.000-08:00

Daviah and I are currently studying the book, Know Why You Believe, which deals with common questions used to discredit Christianity. Included, of course, is the problem of evil. This dilemma-either god is not all-good because He allows evil and suffering or He is not all-powerful and can't stop evil and suffering-has been a stumbling block for many people. Yet as I was thinking about it this week I realized that the fact that we ask this question means we have missed the whole point. Too often Christians seek to answer this question and explain things in a way that still validates the question, that still buys into this idea that God somehow owes us a blissful existence. Yet the question we should ask is not, "why is there evil in the world?" but "why is there good?" I do not deserve the good in this world. Were the world to reflect what I am owed it would be a place of far more suffering and far less joy. It would be a place of complete death and destruction. Yet somehow we can pridefully look into our own hearts and still complain to God that He is not giving us what we think is our due. Oh that we would realize the depths of our own sin and that which we truly deserve. Then we would be overwhelmed, not by the amount of evil and suffering in this world, but rather by the amount of beauty and joy we are allowed.

Everything to Enjoy

2009-02-21T14:12:00.000-08:00

"For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, for it is made holy by the word of God and prayer." ~I Timothy 4:4-5

This verse has been on my heart and mind a lot the last few months. In the area of the material world-as in many other areas-the modern American church seems to have difficulty finding balance. In our materialistic culture it is easy to fall off of one side of the horse and fix our eyes on the creation rather than the Creator (the perennial temptation of mankind-see Rom 1). We can so easily become consumed with stuff and money, always thinking we need more and missing the whole point of these gifts. The values in all that God has created lies ultimately not with the stuff itself, but with the Creator. There is only one stipulation in the above verse. We are allowed to receive and embrace any part of creation God makes available to us, as long as it is done in thanksgiving. when we fix our eyes greedily on the objects of creation, there is no room for gratitude. However, when we allow creation to be a vehicle to turn our eyes toward the Giver of all good gifts, we cannot help but be overwhelmed with gratitude-gratitude which in turn will deepen our love and commitment to our Covenant Father.

However, in my experience, it is nearly as easy to fall off the other side of the horse, to reject God's good gifts. The scripture is clear: nothing is to be rejected. Yet in many corners of the American church today there are those who look down on riches, who idolize poverty, or who spend their lives in guilt because God has blessed them. There are those who feel the need to turn their backs on the gifts of God, whether it be beauty, or delicious food, or art, or nature (though in this one area, most Christians allow for some extravagance on God's part), or clothes, or architecture. For too many Christians, any delight in these things is shunned. Or perhaps, more accurately for most, causes some level of guilt, because they cannot get rid of their enjoyment of these things, yet feel that they ought not receive any real pleasure from anything that isn't a prayer session or a Bible study. But this is not of Christ. At the end of First Timothy Paul again reiterates (in case we missed it in chapter four), that God "richly provides us with everything to enjoy" (I Tim 6:17b). God gives us abundant gifts. Why? Because He wants us to enjoy them! And ironically, the only way we can enjoy them is by holding them loosely and lifting our eyes to their Creator with gratitude.

When we are truly able to receive all of God's gifts with gratitude, we have found balance. Our gaze will be fixed where it truly belongs-on Christ- but that gaze will see the fullness and richness and beauty of a God who delights to give good gifts (yes, even material gifts) to His children. Jesus Christ is Lord of all. The things of this material world belong to Him just as much as those things we tend to deem "more spiritual." Let us embrace whatever gifts He chooses to lavish on us with deep gratitude. For when the receiving is with a grateful heart it will not matter whether I dine on bread and water or a sumptuous three-course meal. After all, both are gifts of my Father and both are far more than I deserve.

The Month in Books

2009-02-07T15:02:00.000-08:00

A brief overview of my reading in the last month:

The Path of True Godliness by Willem Teelinck
I'm moving a bit slowly through this book because I want to get the most out of it. It's a translation of a book by a 16th century Dutch Reformer. I've found the book encouraging and convicting. It's an outline of tools and principles to live in godliness. While the book is slightly obscure and probably very hard to find, I would highly recommend it.

A Church in the House by Matthew Henry
This booklet is actually a reprinted sermon that Henry gave in his church in England. While it was originally given about 400 years ago, it is highly applicable today. Henry preaches on the importance of every believing home being a miniature church. He stresses the importance of family worship, family discipline, and godly living together in the household. He especially encourages husbands and fathers, as the heads of their households, to take responsibility in leading their families before the Lord.

Loving God with All Your Mind by Elizabeth George
I've been reading this book in my devotion time for the last couple months and just finished it. This book encourages women to fix their minds on Christ and obey the command to "think on what is true" by filling their minds with scripture. This book has been a constant encouragement as I have read it. It is a valiant call to battle the enemy's lies with the truth of the Word.

Passionate Housewives, Desperate for God by Chancey and McDonald
I don't know that I can praise this book highly enough. After reading some things on Biblical womanhood recently that either ignored or twisted the scripture's teachings directed specifically at woman, this was a soundly scriptural proclamation of godly womanhood. It clearly paints a picture of the beauty of dying to self and glorifying God as a woman and a homemaker.

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley
Daviah and I read this for school as a part of examining worldviews. Shelley's romantic outlook on life comes through as she paints a picture of a mankind that is inherently good, but is then corrupted by the cruelness of society.

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louise Stevenson
Again, Daviah and I read this for school, as a contrast to the worldview of Frankenstein. Stevenson portrays a more Biblical view of man, showing forth his sinful nature and his inability to save himself.

Sound Doctrine: Kingdom Building and Ministry pt one

2009-01-29T09:59:00.000-08:00

Most serious Christians believe that we ought to be involved in building the Kingdom of God, in ministry. However, in the modern American church the ideas what that means and what it looks like are very often quite unbalanced and even unbiblical. Again, these problems tend to stem from a lack of understanding of the teachings of Scripture.

One of the big problems stems from the modern division between "full-time ministry" and all other jobs. People who are really serious about their faith are supposed to go into full-time ministry, some sort of job or vocation where the only focus of their work is to "do ministry." Other jobs are often looked on as secondary. Unfortunately, this division is completely unbiblical. Biblically all believers are called to full-time ministry, whether they are a lawyer, accountant, homemaker, librarian, or McDonald's burger-flipper. Every legitimate vocation (obviously excluding those which are inherently sinful) is a full time ministry job. The Lordship of Christ is to extend over the courtroom, finances, business, homes, and even McDonald's. Each of these professions exists for this purpose: to make manifest the rain of Christ over every square inch of the universe. Not only that, but all of these professions involve people. Wherever there are people, we are called to minister. Now this is not to say that no one is called to vocational ministry. However, the list of vocational ministry positions in scripture is much shorter than the list available today. Biblically, there are two vocational ministry positions within the church: elders and deacons. Outside the church, there are missionaries and evangelists. But because we have convinced ourselves that the only (or at least the best) way to serve God is to go into vocational ministry, we have invented all sorts of other ministry roles. This is not to say that all other vocational ministries are necessarily sinful, but we must be careful when the jobs we invent begin to take precedence over the jobs God has assigned. In multiplying vocational ministry we have robbed the vast majority of the world of faithful ministers of the gospel. I am convinced that until the church can once again embrace the principle that Christ is truly Lord of all, from politics to the arts and that believers need to be active and faithful in all fields, that kingdom growth will continue to remain slow, stagnant, and perhaps even move backwards (as we have witnessed over the last 100 years or so). When all faithful Christians are concerned about is "saving souls" they usually don't even end up doing that. Evangelism is only a tiny fraction of the Great Commission. The next part, "teaching them to obey all that I have commanded them," is a much bigger job. And among those commands we are called to obey are the commands to take dominion of all the earth, to work hard, and to do everything for the glory of God. We are all called to build the kingdom of God, to minister to those around us, and to make disciples of all nations. Let us not shortchange Kingdom growth by abandoning areas God has called us to take for His glory. The battlefield is broad and wide. It is in the hearts of all people, first and foremost, but it is also in the halls of congress, and the halls of universities, in business ventures and board meetings, in the handwork of carpenters and plumbers, and perhaps most importantly, in our homes.

I have more thoughts to share on this subject, but they'll have to wait a little while. In the mean time, I encourage you to embrace the call to minister to whoever God places in your path and to build the Kingdom in whatever role you may find yourself. These are every bit as important as the "full time ministry" positions that so many aspire to...in our world today, they may even be more important.

Remember

2009-01-23T15:07:00.000-08:00

Yesterday marked the 36th anniversary of the passing of Roe v Wade. On that day the Supreme Court ruled that a woman has a constitutional right to abortion. While abortions occurred before this historic case, it was the Roe decision that led to the widespread deaths of unborn children. Since that time over 40 million infants have quietly been done away with. Sadly, the guilt inside the church is often as great as that in the world-and perhaps greater, for we have been given the command to love and care for the "least of these."

While many people think of abortion as a rather recent development, the killing of unwanted children is nearly as old as the earth. In many ancient societies parents held the power of life and death for their children long after they were born. Whether it was via gruesome child sacrifices or the abandonment of an infant to the wilderness, "expendable" children were often done away with. In fact, it was only as Christianity became widespread that these young lives were valued. Only within a Judeo-Christian worldview are the lives of the most vulnerable protected. When man tries to play God, disaster ensues.

We live today in a society that fails to protect its unborn children. Looking around, the fight can seem hopeless. But I'm sure it also looked hopeless to the early Christians who were vastly outnumbered and living in a pagan Roman society that was, in many ways, more decadent than our own. Yet they were not discouraged. Trusting God, they were faithful to work and serve and build the kingdom it whatever ways He made possible. Early Christians rescued abandoned children and raised them in their own homes. They couldn't elect officials and didn't have access to much of a political process to appeal Rome's barbaric processes. But they did what they could. Let us, who have far greater numbers and more avenues of battle open to us, do no less than they did. Let us not grow discouraged, but, trusting God, continue to fight the battle in whatever way God grants us opportunity.

The battle against abortion will not be won by us. Like all other battles, it will be won by our God. But let us not refuse to be tools in His hand, to be used however He sees fit. For some it will mean fighting the political battle, for some it will mean ministering to woman at risk for abortion, for some it will simply mean praying. But whatever we do, let us not forget the blood of 4o million children that stains our hands. We must remember.

Sound Doctrine: Raising up Idols

2009-01-13T13:42:00.000-08:00

One of the most dangerous consequences of not having sound doctrine is that it very often causes us to raise up idols for ourselves (and often for others). When the Word of God ceases to become the foundation for our thought and life, something else will fill its place. And too often, we begin to take what God has called good and minimize it, or even what God has called evil and begin to exalt it. Our priorities are no longer reflective of the priorities God has laid out, but instead reflect the culture around us. This is very often evident in child-rearing. A parent's goals are for his child are very telling. Far too often, Christian parents are more interested in raising clean-cut, "normal" children, rather than Children who will love God with all their heart, soul, mind, and strength. Parents think they've succeeded if their children don't smoke or drink, are going to college, and if their daughters aren't pregnant. Yet they don't care if their children are living completely self-absorbed lives (and often even encourage this lifestyle). I would far rather have a child who smokes a couple cigarettes a week and has a servant's heart, than a non-smoking self-centered child. After all, smoking isn't a sin (yes, before you freak out, addictive and excessive smoking is a sin...but then, so is the addictive and excessive consumption of caffeine), but the idolatry of self is. However, to our culture, smoking is the ultimate sin (look at how much money is spent getting people to quit) while "doing your own thing" is the goal of life. And too often, we Christians follow suit.

Education is another prime example. Most mainstream Christian parents I know would have a fit if their child decided not to go to college. However, they routinely allow all sorts of disobedient and disrespectful behavior in that same child. Why? Because culturally, mouthing off to one's parents is expected, but not going to college is another cardinal sin...one that brands you backward, unintelligent, and irresponsible. Unfortunately, the Bible doesn't back these conclusions. The Bible is more concerned that we acquire wisdom than a diploma and no where does it say that achieving a high level of academic achievement are necessary to building the kingdom of God. It does make sure to tell us, however, that God enjoys using ordinary, unschooled men. And, on the other hand, the Bible is pretty clear about where it stands on the issue of disrespect to parents. Under the old covenant, it was punishable by death. In the new covenant it is listed among such sins as murder. Romans one might even suggest that in God's eyes disobeying one's parents is more despicable than homosexuality (one of the few sins modern American Christians do seem to care about).

Alcohol is another good example. While large portions of the Modern American church believe that consuming alcohol, even in small amounts, is either sinful, or at least very unwise in our given culture (with its tendencies toward drunkenness and alcoholism), the Bible gives no such indications. Christ drank wine, encouraged others to drink wine, and even-in the institution of the Lord's Supper- commanded his followers to drink wine. Not only this, but all this occurred in a culture that, as far as we can tell, was just as prone to drunkenness as ours is. In fact, the broader Roman culture into which the gospel went forth was considerably more dissipated than ours is today. It was so far gone, in fact, that believers in Corinth were actually getting drunk taking communion. Paul's solution, however, wasn't to get rid of the wine, but to tell them to practice self-control. What most believers don't realize is that the modern Christian American (for it mostly limited to the US) phobia of alcohol doesn't come from the Bible. Instead, it comes from the temperance movement-a group of well-intentioned women who, like good moderns, believed that the problems were found in the drink and not in those consuming the drink. The movement was closely linked with the Social Gospel and and early forms of feminism (which, ironically, are rejected by most of those who embrace temperance). When Christians jumped on board, they suddenly realized that they would need to find some Biblical support if it would be widely accepted in Christendom. And so they sought to twist the scriptures to fit their own ideas about sin. And yet many Christians today are more passionate about avoiding this "sin" than they are about many actual sins.

When what we prioritize, what we value, and what we label sin are not built on the firm foundation of sound doctrine, the traditions of men quickly take over. We, however, must not be tossed about by every wind of doctrine, but rather study to show ourselves approved-workmen who need not be ashamed.

Sound Doctrine

2009-01-09T10:59:00.000-08:00

Sound doctrine and theology aren't exactly at the top of the priority list for most modern evangelical Christians. Doctrinal discussions are considered boring. We are told that doctrine divides. When looking for a church, most people are more concerned with the worship style and the programs offered, than they are whether or not the church teaches sound doctrine. However, the Bible clearly teaches the importance of sound doctrine, orthodoxy, good theology....whatever you would like to call it. Why? Because ideas have consequences. How we live flows out of what we believe. Now, of course, there are those who "believe" all the right things, but who do not live it out. This, of course, is not the goal. While these people may say they believe sound doctrine, they cannot truly believe it. For orthodoxy (right believing) will always lead to orthopraxy (right living). This is a believing that goes beyond the brain and penetrates the heart to the transformation of lives.

I love the book of Titus because it speaks so eloquently to the importance -and practicality- of sound doctrine. In his greeting, the Apostle Paul declares that one of the goals of his apostleship is the "knowledge of truth that leads to godliness" (Tit1:1b). It is only in the knowledge of truth (that is , sound doctrine) that we can be lead into greater godliness. In the beginning of chapter two, Paul commands Titus to "teach what is in accord with sound doctrine" (Titus 2:1). Interestingly, chapter two is a very practical chapter, telling various groups of believers how to live their lives. But it is built on the foundation of solid theology.

So many Christians these days don't want to be bothered with theology and doctrine. Instead, they just want to know what they are supposed to do. They want a sermon to give them "practical applications" rather than a mere knowledge of truth. Now I'm not belittling practical applications. If we do not apply what we believe, our faith is useless. But this kind of thinking far too easily reduces the Bible to a "self-help" book. When we skip the sound doctrine and go strait to the application, chances are we will end up, not with no doctrine (for that is impossible), but with faulty doctrine. And faulty doctrine will always lead to faulty living. Let us, as a church, once again embrace a deep love, a real love for knowing what we believe and allowing it to transform our lives.

Merry Christmas

2008-12-20T15:40:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time....
I was alone
I was in darkness
I was in fear
I was separated
I was dead

Once upon a time....
He came to Bethlehem
Through a young woman's submission
A young man's willingness to listen
And a Father's perfect plan

Once upon a time...
Life was changed forever

Now....
I am loved
I live in light
I live in trust
I belong
I am alive

Because....
He was born

Gratitude

2008-12-11T11:01:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving has now led into Christmas, but gratitude is still on my mind. Being thankful seems to pop up all over the Scriptures. It is added on to all sorts of other commands...."Pray...and be thankful," "Let the peace of Christ rule...and be thankful," "Let the Word of God dwell in you....and be thankful," "Be patient...and give thanks." (See Col. 1:12, 3:15-16, 4:2). And on the flip side, a lack of thankfulness is counted among the gravest sins. Romans one speaks eloquently of those who have turned there backs on God, replacing the glory of God with the image of a creature. Among there cardinals sins? "They did not honor Him as God or give thanks to Him" (Rom 1:21). While gratitude might be pretty low on a list of favorite American virtues (after all..it's hard to be a rabid consumer when you're so busy being grateful for what you already have, it is high on God's list of virtues. Why? Because gratitude is a good foundation for so many other virtues. If we are grateful people, how can we complain? If we are grateful people, how can we turn our backs on Him? If we are grateful people, we cannot help but live our lives for His glory alone. And of all people, we who are His children have the most to be grateful for. We owe Him the gratitude of the creature to the Creator as well as the gratitude of the redeemed to the Redeemer. We are to be doubly grateful. Gratitude should not be that hard. RC Sproul, Jr. once said that if we could simply live in the light of what we are really owed--death and destruction--than gratitude would overflow in our lives. But too often we-I- get so caught up in wanting someone else's blessing, in being discontent with God's gifts, in comparing my lot to someone else's, that somehow I forget all that I deserve is hell. But that is the truth and oh, may I ever live with that before my eyes. I deserve death and have been given life. I deserve hell and have been given heaven. I deserve destruction and have been given wholeness. I deserve bondage and have been given freedom. I deserve dark and have been given light. I deserve Mordor and have been given the Grey Havens. I deserve Jadis and have been given Aslan. I deserve the rule of the father of lies, but have been given HIM-the Pearl of Great Price. How can I keep from singing His praise?

Thoughts from a Crisis Pregnancy Center

2008-11-29T11:57:00.000-08:00

At the end of September I started training to be a volunteer counselor at a local crisis pregnancy center. I'm now through with training, but as we went through the training I was faced with women in hard situations, situations that make me so thankful to God for the life He has given me. As I think about women who gt into situations where abortion seems the only alternative, I have been contemplating the broader societal causes of abortion. While legislation and legal protection of the unborn are vitally important, the causes of abortion are sinful hearts and the influence of a sinful culture on these sinful hearts. We will never win the battle against abortion until we replace lies with the truth and see lives invaded by the power and love of Jesus Christ.

At its heart the cause of abortion is selfishness. In training I read an article about what goes on in the heart and mind of most abortion-vulnerable women. These women don't need to be convinced that what they are carrying is a child (which has been the main pro-life line of attack). Whether they admit it or not almost all women know that there is life within them. The article went on to say that women in crisis pregnancy situations tend to view the situation as one where one life needs to end-either their own or their baby's. When a society has spent much of its education (and advertising) telling its citizens to "look out for number one" is it any wonder that women choose their own lives over that of their offspring? Yet what a sickening comment on our culture and our value system. How far we have come from the ethic of Christianity where laying down one's life for the weak and vulnerable is the height of virtue.

Beyond this, I think the causes of abortion are intricately linked to the lies of feminism that have been fed to our young women for their entire lives (and to our young men as well). Girls grow up being taught that they don't need males. they Are strong, they are independent and they can make it on their own. They can't let a man "tie them down" and keep them from their dreams. And girls believe them...for a little while. But deep down, all females feel a need for a man in their life. They crave male attention, male love, and male protection. But since society has told them that this is a sign of weakness, they don't look for that authority and protection from a healthy, God-ordained source. Instead they believe the next lie of feminism. They believe that they can give themselves to any man they wish without emotional attachment and without consequences. They start looking for the security they crave in all the wrong places. And these girls, confused about who they are and the desires they have inside....desires the feminists have told them they shouldn't have.....they end up pregnant.

And here the lies of feminism continue to have their grip. You see these girls have been told all their lives that their value lies being independent, in following their own dreams, in going out into the world and making their mark in some glorious career. They've also been told that babies don't let girls reach those goals, that being "just" a mother is a disgrace to their entire sex and all that women have fought to be "liberated" from. Children might be OK when you are almost forty and have already made your mark on the world (at which point women discover they've been lied to again and its too late for them to have children), but a child when you're young is the ultimate disaster for feminist thought. And so these young women view the new life growing within them as a threat to their very identities and lives.

And then there are the young men (and not so young men) who get them in these situations. Is it any wonder that after being told all their lives that girls don't need them, that girls can make it on their own, that young men say....OK, you deal with this...and leave the girls to handle their crisis on their own. Or perhaps, feeling a need to provide but feeling like all means of provision have been taken away from them, these young man see helping to get rid of the problem as the only way they can provide for the young woman. The problem of abortion is complicated, but so much of it ties back to the complete societal breakdown of God-honoring, Bible based male-female relationships. It goes back to the disintigration of the family structure in general. Girls who don't receive the love and protection they need from their fathers are much more likely to end up in an unplanned pregnancy. And when that happens, the same lack of love and protection means they probably won't feel the support they need to make a healthy decision in a difficult situation.

It is heartbreaking to look not just at the untold loss of life that abortion has brought into our country, but also at the lies young women have been told that leads to that loss of life. It is humbling and a powerful reminder that the battle against abortion happens at the very foundations of society, in our homes and our churches and our streets long before a girl ends up at Planned Parenthood. It is a battle that will be won, not by us, but by our great God as we go forth in humility, prayer, obedience, and grace.

Thoughts from the Kitchen

2008-11-01T13:34:00.000-07:00

Friday at about noon I took a moment to look around the kitchen. It was...to say the least...slightly chaotic. The counters were covered with bowls, pans, bags of flour, etc. The table was graced with a cookie sheet of drying pumpkin seeds, apple cores and eels, and an open laptop. However, I would like to point out that this mess was well earned. That morning this kitchen had produced two pies, one batch of muffins, and one nearly completed essay. Looking at this kitchen inspired several thoughts:

~This kitchen was certainly a mess. Of course if you never make anything, you never have a mess. But you miss out on having a joyful and productive life. If you never create, you also don't have to clean up. But you don't quite bear the image of God as you could. It's important to distinguish between the mess of disorganization and laziness and the mess of creativity and industry. The former is to be avoided, while the latter embraced. Of course...even creative, productive messes need to be cleaned up:)

~This is where I get my theory of home-education-from kitchens like these. Learning was never supposed to be separated from real life. There may be times when education requires peace and solitude, but those are the exception rather than the rule. When we look to scripture we see education taking place in the midst of ordinary life - when they sit at home and walk along the road, when they lie down and when they get up (see Dt. 6). Real learning takes place in kitchens and living rooms and minivans and offices and parks....not just in classrooms.

~Daviah spent the morning intermittently helping me bake an apple pie and writing an essay on the Biblical worldview. In Christian homemaking these two things are hardly incongruous. While the world looks down on the call of the homemaker, the Bible esteems it. Yet being a homemaker doesn't mean one is thoughtless. The Christian homemaker is equally at home studying theology and rolling out pie crusts. She recognizes the immense value of both. Homemaking is hardly demeaning. I believe it was Patricia St. John who said (and I paraphrase) that homemaking was not a mindless occupation. After all, as the homemaker stirs her soup she can be reading Shakespeare. As she kneads the dough she can be thinking great thoughts.

Anyway...those are a few thoughts inspired by my kitchen.

Preparing for a Wedding

2008-10-18T14:55:00.000-07:00

It struck me afresh earlier this week that life on this earth is all a precursor to the wedding feast of the Lamb and His bride. That means that right now we are in the "engagement" stage (or betrothal would be a better Biblical word). While we are committed to Christ we are not yet fully bound to Him. We are not yet allowed to touch Him. Yet this reality does not change the fact that our relationship is real. Engagement is a real, though incomplete, time in a couple's relationship. In the same way, we now live in the incomplete reality. Yet during betrothal both bride and groom look forward to and spend there time planning and preparing for the wedding. That is what we are called to do now. Our Heavenly Husband is faithfully preparing a home for us and has also promised to prepare us for the wedding by making His bride pure and spotless. Are we being faithful to do our part? Are we falling more in love with our Groom? Are we allowing Him to purify us? Are we being faithful with the tasks He has entrusted, knowing that our obedience will last into eternity? Are we filling our "hope chests" with faithfulness, love, and complete obedience? Marriages can happen with very little preparation, but they usually turn out better where real thought and effort has been placed into them.

Thoughts on Ministry

2008-10-06T18:37:00.000-07:00

Over the last couple months I read two books that...well, frustrated me. Sadly, both these books were written by fellow believers. I agreed with much that was said in them. Much of their messages was true and important. Yet, when I got to the end of both books, I felt that what I had just read could be a very dangerous tool. You see, both books espoused an idea that is prevalent in some corners of the Christian world. The idea is this: real Christians serve God in the slums, the inner city, or third world countries. If you are living in the suburbs, however, you are living a life of self-indulgence, a life that is clearly not pleasing to God. This message has cropped up in different forms throughout the history of the church, but I think it is especially dangerous in our day and time. Here is why:

1. Such thinking tends to equate selflessness with living in the slums. Unfortunately, selfishness is a matter of the heart and not location. Just as living in the suburbs is not a guarantee of selfishness, neither is living in the slums a guarantee of selflessness. In fact, such ministry not only can be, but often is, driven by the flesh. It was in my life. All my desires to minister among the "poorest of the poor" were flesh and pride based. Instead, it was here in the suburbs that I learned what dying to self looked like. In our day and age even the world applauds people who adopt orphans (Like Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie), people who build schools for poor children in Africa (like Oprah), people who spend their lives on the streets. As long as one leaves Jesus out of it, the world is all in favor of humanitarian efforts....not at the expense of their own comfort, but nonetheless working with the poor is popular (especially among young people). This atmosphere makes it all the more likely that people will fall into these "ministries" out of their flesh rather than out of the call of God.

2. Such thinking severely limits the call of God. Both these books, while not stating it explicitly, strongly implied that God never calls people to the suburbs (or at least almost never). The "real" work happens somewhere else. This simply isn't true. I think of my own parents who, as a young married couple, were pretty sure that the only place to serve God was the inner city....until God called them to the last place they ever wanted to go: suburbia. Living in suburbia can be a step of self-sacrifice as well. And to limit the call of God to a specific type of real estate seems rather akin to relegating worship to the Old Covenant Temple. God's kingdom is like leaven, working through all the world.

3. Such thinking tends to relegate the work of the kingdom to somewhere "out there." This is a lie that American Christianity has definitely bought into. "Ministry" means homeless people, orphans, and prostitutes. While I'm not degrading ministry to the above classes of people (it is important and biblical) these aren't the only people who need ministering to. There are ministry opportunities all around us. And the call of God is never "out there" somewhere. The call of God is always here and now. He desires our obedience now, our love now, our service now...whether we are in the poorest village in Africa, among the most lost tribes of Asia, or in our average neighbourhood in Centennial, Colorado.

4. Such thinking tends to weaken the working of believers in building the kingdom, rather than strengthen it. For when we ingrain the above type of thinking into peoples hearts they start to think that they can't be ministering if the person isn't about to die of AIDS (of course this is slightly exaggerated, but you get the idea). I have seen those people who long to go on the mission field and minister to the poor, but are dishonoring to their parents, unkind to their siblings, and miss the hundreds of ministry opportunities God has placed right in front of them. Why do they miss them? Because all along they thought ministry took place on the other side of the world. Instead of telling believers, "what are you doing here in your comfortable homes sitting in comfortable neighbourhoods. Get out there to the slums," perhaps we ought to tell them: "be a faithful servant right where God has placed you. Be open to the call of God to another place, but never let that close your eyes to the kingdom work that needs to be done right here."

5. Such thinking tends limit poverty and needs to one segment of society. This simply isn't true. There is poverty, hunger, and nakedness in every community across the globe. It may take different forms, but all of these people are in need of ministry. Christ did not just minister to the physically poor, He also ministered to Nicodemus, who though physically well off was spiritually needy. He ministered to Joseph of Arimathea, a wealthy man whose spiritual nakedness needed to be covered with the garments of salvation. His own disciples tended to come not from the poorest of the poor, but from the working class. All of these were fallen human beings in need of food and clothing, though it was not always spiritual. We don't need to go out in search of poverty, poverty is all around us, if only we will have eyes to see it. For some it will be the poverty of not being bale to afford food, but for others it will be the poverty of starving for love. Let us open our eyes and serve those God has placed right before us. After all, as Mother Teresa said, "Jesus said love one another. He didn't say love the whole world." Far too often we are so busy loving the whole world that we forget to love our neighbor.

6. Such thinking tends to cause discontentment. For many believers it is simply not possible to move somewhere were they can live among the physically starving or dying. Many are not called to this and so God provides no opportunity. Yet how frustrating to think that God Himself will not allow you to go where you can serve. We do not need more discontent Christians pining away in their homes, longing for the day they can leave this country behind. We need more Christians living faithful and obedient lives right where they are.

7. Such thinking goes against the Biblical norm. If we look at the book of Acts ( as well as the epistles of the rest of the NT) we see a pattern emerging. Missionaries/evangelists go into a location. People become believers. Then what happens? They are not told to leave and go somewhere else to build the kingdom. Rather, Paul (and others like him) establishes churches which are to be permanent outposts of Christianity in the community. The vast majority of the new believers remain right where they always were. They begin to manifest the sovereign reign of God as Elders in the churches, or deacons, as husbands and wives, as parents and children, as ordinary laborers or even slaves. They begin to minister to the needs of their own community and faithfully bring all their lives under the authority of Christ. That is what leaven working through all the dough looks like. That is what a mustard seed growing looks like. Of course, this is not the calling of all. Some indeed are chosen to go on the mission field, to plant new churches and start the whole cycle over again. Those who are sent out are supported, encouraged, and prayed for by the churches and so all do participate in these ministries. But not all are called to leave. In fact, most are called to stay. They knew, as too often we forget, that there was kingdom-work to be done everywhere.

I hope and pray that God will rise up believers who will go into the slums, the inner cities, and the unbelieving countries of our world because of His call on their lives. I pray the gospel will be preached in those places and churches established to begin the long-term work of the kingdom. I also pray that God will encourage many believers to be faithful and radically obedient right where they are, in their own communities and neighbourhoods. I pray that God will open all our eyes to the needs around us. I pray that the world will see the church in all her glory as we seek to love our neighbors, to serve those around us, to be faithful husbands and wives, to raise our children to the glory of God, and to pursue a whole host of other "obediences" that make up the beautiful tapestry that is called the Kingdom of God.

The Heart of Biblical Femininity

2008-09-19T15:15:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of ideas out there about what "femininity" looks like. Stereotypes abound and Christians all over have produced there own versions of what femininity looks like. Many have let the world define femininity. Some look to the Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus version of femininity. What defines us as women is that we are are more relational than men. While that may be true, it hardly serves as a rallying call for femininity. Some accept feminism's lies that women and men aren't really any different. Others define godly femininity as simply being a good christian. Godly women are completely surrendered to Christ, they love and serve Him. Some go on to define godly femininity as there own version of what "good Christianity" looks like: godly femininity means going on the mission field or working with aids victims or starting an orphanage. While I believe that we as women are called to be faithful Christians, we are also called to be Christian Women. Finding the secret to godly femininity means finding the truth of what women are called to be as opposed to men. Men are also called to be completely surrendered to Christ and to love and serve them. So while these characteristics are certainly godly, they do not help us define femininity. And when a to do list is given of what "real" godliness looks like (usually involving going to another country, or at very least the inner city) this picture of godliness can actually lead away from Biblical femininity.

So what does Biblical femininity look like? There is only one place we can go to learn this: to the Bible. How does the Bible define femininity? It can be summed up in one word: helper. Woman was created to be a helper. That means being under authority. It means that woman was never given her "own" job to do, her "own" calling to fulfill. Instead she is given to a man to help fulfill his calling. When our focus on femininity forgets this, it will almost always tend toward feminism. Why? Because our natural, sinful inclination is to independence. This isn't a curse of the 21st century; it has always been true-ever since the fall.

Biblically speaking, motherhood is also a central part of what woman was created to do. Eve was created as a helper and her name indicates "mother." Here in creation we see what women is called to....that which she was created for. This is the heart of what Biblical femininity looks like (though that doesn't by any means exclude unmarried women). All of a woman's life is to be built around family and home. All the Biblical passages that deal with women stress that these are there priorities (Prov 31, Titus 2, I Tim 5). Does this mean that women can't do anything else? Not at all. These women also serve the poor and minister to believers. They even have some business ventures on the side. However, all of this is an expression of their role as a helper. These women serve the poor to extend their husband's ministries, not establish their own. When we make serving the poor the benchmark of Christian femininity we open the door to a whole host of selfish, independent girls who think they are living out Biblical femininity, but in reality have completely turned there backs on it. Christian femininity is indeed about strength, but the strength that is shown in submission. It is indeed about service, but a service that is poured out first and foremost to family, then to the church community, and then to the world. Biblical femininity embraces being under authority. Biblical femininity embraces the centrality of home. Biblical femininity never ignores the needs of the world. But Biblical femininity also know she isn't called to fix all the worlds problems and that she is never called to fix the worlds problems in a spirit of independence.

I have another post I want to write about the dangers of making inner-city/slum ministry the standard of what Christianity is about that connects with these ideas, but for now that will have to wait. Suffice it to say that illuminating holiness as holiness is a very beneficial thing. But illuminating holiness and calling it femininity is potentially misleading and dangerous.

The Trinity

2008-09-04T14:11:00.000-07:00

For much of my growing up years the Trinity was a doctrine that I knew I needed to believe, but didn't really understand and didn't spend much time thinking about. However, in the last few years I've been seeing how important the idea of the Trinity is and how it shapes all of reality. Two of those examples came up in my reading today and the topic was once more brought to mind. You see, the Trinity is the answer to one of the most discussed philosophical problems of all time-the problem of the one and the many. Philosophers throughout history have argued about which is the primary principle of the universe: unity or diversity. But as Christians who serve the Triune God we realize that the question is not an either/or question....the answer is both! Our God is both One and Many (three, to be specific). But what does this have to do with life? Everything. All creation reflects the nature of God, particularly the Trinity.

It has been said that the basis of beauty is in the marriage of diversity and harmony. Both diversity and harmony are only possible in a Trinitarian world. Within the Trinity each person is unique, with their own job in history. And yet, mysteriously, they are still one. Perhaps the best illustration of this in creation is marriage. It is almost unbelievable that in His perfect creation God would declare something to be "not good," but He did. "It is not good for man to be alone." Why? Because man alone could not truly reflect the image of the Triune God, who was essentially and in His very nature relational. And so, God created woman and in marriage shows us a picture of the Trinity. Two distinct, unique, diverse creatures (though in many ways the same) with different functions and callings within the relationship, nevertheless are brought into perfect unity ("and the two shall become one flesh"). Paul describes this as a great mystery..which indeed it is, as is the Trinity.

This principle is found in God's other institutions as well. I read I Corinthians 12 this morning, with its description of the church. We are one body, but many different parts. We have our own place, our own giftings, our own callings, but one purpose, one goal, one Lord. Interestingly, the other place this came up in my readings today is in the book God and Government, where the author pointed out that God established many spheres of government and authority (state, church, family) as an expression of the Trinity. It is interesting to note that our own form of government is made up of three branches. When you start looking, pictures of the Trinity can be seen everywhere.

This is one of the reasons we must so careful to distinguish the One True God from allah and the god of modern day Jews. If there is no Trinity, this is not the same God. You cannot have the Father without the Son and the Holy Spirit. They are One. Yet He is Three.

Why I'm going to homeschool my children

2008-09-02T07:39:00.000-07:00

You don't have to look to far these days to find someone defending homeschooling- from young parents trying to convince naysaying relatives to national organizations pitching homeschool students to colleges. Whoever the defender, however, there is often a common theme: homeschool students are good because they excel academically. Homeschool students win spelling bees, have higher test scores, and graduate earlier. Homeschool students know Latin, read Shakespeare, and actually remember the date the Magna Carta was signed. Now there is nothing wrong with any of these things. I'm happy that homeschoolers win spelling bees. But if we make academic excellence our goal in homeschooling, I'm afraid we've missed the point. RC Sproul Jr points out in his book, When You Rise Up, that too often we keep the goal of the world, but just change around the way we get to the goal a little bit. But as believers we are called to have a radically different goal than the world. I don't want to homeschool so that my kids can excell academically (although I do hope that will be true as well). I want to homeschool my children so that they grow into adults who are deeply in love with their Savior and passionately committed to living lives of faithful obedience to Him. Can academic excellence be a part of that? Certainly. But if that is my goal in home education, I've embraced friendship with the world. Hopefully we don't have to choose, but if I had to I'd rather have children with below average intelligence who walk with their Lord than Rhodes scholars who are in rebellion against Him.

Why I'm a Calvinist and Why it Matters

2008-08-30T19:24:00.000-07:00

When you use the word "Calvinist" these people get all sorts of interesting pictures in there heads. Usually the picture involves a dour-faced Puritan, dressed all in black and never having any fun. While there is some truth to this picture (because the Puritans were indeed Calvinists) it also obscures most of the truth (because the Puritan were actually among the most joyful people who I think have ever lived on earth). I'm a Calvinist. While Calvin taught lots of good things, what this generally refers to is a belief in predestination (which is often summed up in the acronym TULIP: T-Total depravity U-Unconditional election L-Limited atonement I-Irresistible grace P-Perseverance of the saints). While it's a pretty complicated subject, what it basically boils down to is that a man's salvation is ultimately chosen by God, not the man himself. Now, this subject is (and has been) a subject of some controversy in Christian circles. It's a subject I've debated numerous times (the debates usually end with someone in tears). At the end the question usually is-why does it matter? After all a person is saved by faith in Christ. Whether he believes in predestination or not doesn't affect his salvation. This is completely true. But I still believe passionately that believing in predestination is important. Here's why:

~It keeps salvation fully in the realm of God's grace. If God's grace has been equally extended to all men and it is up to them to decide, then man is still saved by his works. What would separate me from an unsaved man is not the grace of God (if that has been equally extended to all men). Instead what separates us is my own decision, my wisdom or humility or something in myself that ultimately saves me. The saving grace of God must be a gift wholly from Him....not dependant on man's effort or choice.

~It keeps intact the sovereignty of God. If God is truly God than He must be sovereign over all.-including who is saved and who is damned. Are there mysteries in this? Certainly. But if God is not sovereign over salvation than He is not sovereign at all.

~It deals with the actual nature of sin. Scripture teaches that we are dead in our sins-not mortally ill or in grave danger-dead. A dead man is incapable of choosing anything. First He must be made alive. Then he can choose. This is what predestination teaches-God must first make us alive before we can choose Christ. When Lazarus was raised from the dead he was not consulted in the matter. Of course, only a fool would be upset that no one consulted him in his own resurrection.

~It makes me all the more grateful to God. If my salvation is not at all of my own making than I must owe all of myself to God. I must rejoice all the more in Him, for He has truly given me everything.

~Of course, the most significant reason I think that predestination is important is because the Bible teaches it:) Does our salvation depend upon us choosing Christ? Absolutely. But we cannot choose Christ unless He has first chosen us.

Of course, there are objections to this view. Most involve questioning the nature of a God who could choose to send people to hell. In response to this all I have to say is: "who are you, O man, to answer back to God?" (Rom. 9:20a).

As I said before, it's not like one's view of predestination affects one's salvation. But one's view of predestination does affect one's view of the sovereignty of God, which in turn affects of your view of everything else in life. And that is why it's an important discussion to have.

The Wall

2008-08-22T13:53:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking a lot about the state of my heart lately, wanting the light of Christ to probe the deepest corners of it, to reveal the strongholds of flesh in it, to fill it with His beauty and holiness. One thing I've been realizing (or rather God has been showing me) is that I have spent much of my life building a wall around my heart. It was probably four or five years ago when I looked at my life and realized that no one around me really knew me, that I had completely closed my heart off from everyone, and that if I didn't start to learn how to really love others and allow them to love me that my life would never be what God intended. He didn't create man to live this life alone. In fact, even in the garden of Eden, God declared, "it is not good for man to be alone." And so began the slow and painful process of learning to open myself up to others. By the grace of God I've made progress in the last few years. And these last few months I think the slow pace at which I was learning has picked up a little bit. But I still have a lot to learn and a lot of growing to do. God has been transforming the wall around my heart. I don't think that the wall needs to be torn down. After all we are commanded to guard our hearts. There is just as much danger in letting everyone into our hearts as there is in letting no one in. And so I keep the wall up, but I want God to build into my wall a door. Perhaps my heart is like an ancient city. It needs the walls of protection to keep the destruction of invaders away. But a city whose doors never open, soon becomes empty, desolate, and dead. I don't want my heart to shrivel up and die because I could not let anyone in. Yet I also want to be guarded and careful to let those into my heart who will not desecrate it.

Meet Mr. Smith

2008-08-20T12:57:00.000-07:00

I had fully intended to post about the importance of sound doctrine today (and still do plan to at some point), but I just finished Meet Mr. Smith and I'm having a hard time thinking about anything else. I had been wanting to read a Ludy book for awhile. I hadn't read Meet Mr. Smith, but I'd heard good things about it and my friend had a copy I could borrow. And so the book ended up on my desk yesterday afternoon. Even so, I almost didn't read it. Glancing at the subtitle (Revolutionize Your View of Sex, Purity, and Romance) I thought to myself, "maybe this isn't the best book for me to read at this season of life." But despite my hesitations, something (or, more accurately, Someone) prompted me to start reading. Am I ever glad that I did. This book was encouraging, inspiring, convicting, and vision-expanding. I thought I'd share a few of the things God impressed on me while reading it:

~The first thing that stuck out to me as I was reading this is actually something that God has been showing me since coming back from Central Asia: how beautiful and wonderful and worthy and delightful is Christ. This book is dripping with complete adoration of the Savior in a way that is completely contagious. It reminded me of a couple weeks ago when I was reading the parable of the pearl of great price. Meet Mr. Smith showcases that pearl in all His beauty.

~As I was reading this book I had my vision re-inspired for the beauty of purity and holiness. Again, God has been working with me on these areas for a coup;e months now, calling me to higher levels of the pure and the sacred. But this book reminded me of why I long after and strive after these things. Living a pure and holy life takes wisdom and discipline, but its not supposed to be about drudgery and dutifully giving up all pleasure and fun. No, holiness and purity allow one's life to be breathtaking, exciting, beautiful, and joy-filled to the core of one's being. I needed that reminder.

~Meet Mr. Smith proved to be a needed battle ax to attack the flesh that still rears up far too often in my life. It made me look at where "self" still has control and desire all the more strongly to lose my life that I might gain Christ.

Needless to say, I could barely put this book down. It made me smile and cry. But most of all it made me excited to be a woman and a child of God. If you've never read it, I would highly recommend it. If you're anything like me, you won't leave unchanged.

International Students

2008-08-18T09:17:00.000-07:00

Since returning from Central Asia God has really placed International Students on my heart. There are a couple of different reasons for this. One of them was reinforced as I was reading Matthew 25 this morning. Here is the story of the sheep and the goats, when Christ tells his followers, "whatever you have done to the least of these brothers of mine, you have done to me." One of these things is visiting the stranger and the lonely. Shouldn't this be enough of an incentive to open our hearts and homes to international students? They are often very lonely and without connections as they live far from their homes. And whatever we do unto them, Christ counts as done unto Himself. This fact alone should make us eager to reach out to them.

However, there are also other reasons why I think that International Students should be high on our priority list. They provide an amazing opportunity to reach the world with the gospel with out ever leaving our own country (or even home:)). These students-away from their homes and cultural influences-are often at the perfect point in life to come to Christ. Not only that, but many of them return home as people of great influence since they have been educated in the US. If we can reach them now, who know what an impact they might have on their home countries.

Our church is currently trying to start up a ministry to international students. It doesn't take much to reach out to them and have one over for dinner. Even touching one life is important. If nothing else, all of us can pray that these students would have the opportunity to meet Christ during their stay in America.

Return to Blogging

2008-08-15T12:51:00.000-07:00

So, I obviously haven't posted much the last couple weeks. Life has been kind of crazy. Between the business and lack of sleep I haven't been terribly motivated to post. But, since things are calming down and next week the Olympics is mostly track and field (which I don't really enjoy watching) my goal is to get back to more regular blogging schedule then. Until then...I'm trying to catch up on sleep:)

Thoughts on the Law-Part one

2008-08-09T11:35:00.000-07:00

I've had a post on the role of the law in the believer's life rolling around in my head for awhile now. Apparently I took too long to post it, because Jeff (ahomeforthehomeless.blogspot.com) beat me to it. He said a lot of what I was going to say about not pursuing law for the sake of law, but rather using it as a tool. In this post I want to start exploring what that means-how do we properly use the law. In First Timothy Paul writes, "Now we know that the law is good, if one uses it lawfully." (I Tim 1:8, ESV). So it is the responsibility of the believer to discover how to use the law lawfully. This passage shows forth one of the central uses of the law in the next verse: "the law is not laid down for the just but for the lawless and disobedient, for the ungodly and sinners, for the unholy and profane, for those who strike their fathers and mothers, for murderers, the sexually immoral, men who practice homosexuality, enslave rs, liars, perjurers and whatever else is contrary to sound doctrine" (I Tim 1:9-10, ESV). Why do the ungodly need the law of God? To point out sin. Paul discusses this in Romans as well, saying that he would not know what sin is if it were not for the law. Now, I have been given a new nature, but I still have a sin nature that is unholy and profane. Wherever in my life I live as one who is ungodly and a sinner, I prove myself still in need of the law. The law shows me my sin.

I need to go now, but more thoughts will be forthcoming......

Conviction and Grace

2008-08-06T11:36:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking a lot lately about how to achieve the balance in life between living a holy life while being compassionate and gracious to those around me. It seems in my life I always go back and forth between the two. At times in my life when I am able to be gracious and understanding of the weaknesses and failings of those around me I start to become lenient on myself as well. I tend to start making little compromises. But then, as God convicts me about those compromises and I pursue holiness more passionately, I get frustrated with those around me who aren't. But I know that God calls me to a balance-to be able to live in pursuit of holiness while still being full of grace to those around me who are at different stages in their walk with God. And yet I also have some responsibility to call people to a higher standard. I know that God's work in my life will never combine holiness with a lack of love or purity with a harsh and critical spirit. I guess I'm just trying to figure out what all that looks like.

"And what are you going to do with that?"

2008-08-04T12:13:00.000-07:00

This is the number one question when people find out that I've graduated college with a degree in English Literature. I don't like this question. As long as I was in college I could defer all those, "what are you going to do after college?" questions with an, " I don't know exactly." However, now that "after college" is here, that answer doesn't work so well. When the question comes I usually opt for the safe answer: I'm a dance teacher. This is perfectly true, but somehow doesn't exactly capture what it is I'm doing with my life right now. But then, people don't really get what I'm doing with my life right now. We live in a culture that expects young men and young women to live the exact same kind of lives, to have the same goals and directions. When a woman is married and has kids it might be ok for her to have a different kind of life than her husband, but until then a girl is expected, in a lot of ways to "be a man" (ie-move out, get a full time job, pursue a career, etc). But I'm not a man and I don't have the same callings and responsibilities a young man my age does. I don't need to be pursuing a career. I don't have to prepare to provide for a family in the future. I don't need to "make it on my own." Of course, none of this means that I get to be lazy or irresponsible. God calls women to be wise, responsible, faithful, and very hard working (look at the Proverbs 31 woman-she's no wimp:)). But all of that is going to look a little differently in my life than it is in a male's.

So what am I doing with my life now that college is done? Sometimes its hard even for me to put it into words, except to say that I'm seeking to glorify God and enjoy Him, that I'm striving to live a life of love and obedience to my Savior. However, as these answers don't actually give anyone any sort of idea as to what it is I do (which usually seems to be the question asked), I'll try to be a little bit more specific:

~I am seeking to help, serve, bless, and honor my parents as best I can. I am still under my Father's protection and authority, but as an adult member of the household, I want my presence here to be as helpful and useful as possible. My parents have spent years sacrificing to mold me into the person I am today, now it's my turn to sacrifice my life to bless them. I am sure that God counts my honor and service to them as honor and service to Himself. In addition, as I can help and serve them, that allows my parents more time and freedom to pursue the ministry God has called them to. What does that look like practically? For my Dad it means praying for him, taking over the family finances, keeping his office clean, etc. For my Mom it means helping with a lot of the tasks it takes to keep a busy household of eight running: housecleaning, grocery shopping, cooking, etc. It also means helping her homeschool the younger girls, whether in a more "official" capacity (for example, I'll hopefully be teaching my 14 year old sister's literature/Bible/worldview course this fall) or in a more relaxed way by simply being there to explain a math problem that doesn't make sense or give them their spelling words.

~This last means of helping my Mom leads into my next desire for this season of life: that I would make the most of this time by being the best sister I can be, by constantly pointing my younger sisters to Christ, encouraging them, and loving them. I want my life to have an indelible influence on these girls God has placed so centrally in my life. Both of these first two goals I believe are important ministries in and of themselves, but they also have the added benefit of being very good practice for the day I have my own husband, children, and household:).

~Being a dance teacher is also a huge part of my life right now (even though I've had the summer off:)). God has been so good in providing me this job. I get to work with amazing, godly young women who aren't just my co-workers, but my friends. I get to teach sweet young girls, and older girls, and even the occasional little boy not only how to dance, but even more importantly, how to worship their King through their dancing. The job is often physically exhausting, but it is a huge blessing!

~Finally I want to invest myself in...I don't want to say ministry because I believe that all of these things are ministry...outside ministry, I guess. I do believe that I have a responsibility to use the relative freedom of this time in my life to invest in serving and blessing others, both believers and unbelievers. This takes a lot of different forms. This summer it's meant a lot of childcare. (My friend asked me yesterday why I call it that and I'm not really sure other than that's the word I have in my head. You can call it babysitting, nannying, whatever makes sense to you:)). God has also opened up some neat opportunities. I'm working with the missions pastor at our church to get a ministry to international students started up. I'm looking into volunteering as a counselor at a crisis pregnancy center. God has also really placed on my heart a coffee shop near where I live. I've been going there for my devotions almost every day this summer in an effort to establish some kind of relationship with the people there and flood that little corner of the world with the light of Christ. Who knows what other avenues will open up in the future. I want to learn to have my eyes open for opportunities and to make the most of them, even if it's something as small as smiling at the lady at the check out counter or saying "hi" to the person I pass on a walk.

So, that's kind of what I'm doing "post-college." And in case you were concerned, it keeps me plenty busy:).

Encouraging Manhood

2008-08-01T09:58:00.000-07:00

I was cleaning out my filing cabinet yesterday when I found an article by Eric Ludy called "Studying Manhood." The article is directed at young women to encourage them to use their influence the young men in their lives toward truly living as "warrior poets." I thought it was interesting that I stumbled across that article since that was something I'd been thinking about over the last couple days. The subject really came to my mind on Wednesday night when our family went bowling to celebrate some friends' birthdays. Bowling with us on our lane was a twelve-year old boy from our church. Now this young man is the youngest of three boys and as he has a definite lack of sisters and we have a lack of brothers our family has kind of adopted him. He took full advantage of an evening hanging out with his "sisters" to practice being a gentlemen. Every time one of us finished bowling he would pull out their seat and help us into it. He carried our information cards back to the front desk. He filled up our cups and brought us snacks. It made me smile when the other boy bowling on our lane asked for one of the cookies brought over and our "little brother" replied, "You can get your own. You're a boy!" It was so sweet to watch this young man taking such good care of us and to think that by allowing him to do so we get to share in the shaping of a warrior poet. Sure, it probably would have been faster for me to get my own chair and my own drink, but that's not what really matters. I'm sure that by simply letting this boy help into my chair twenty times I am furthering the kingdom, bringing glory to my Father, and preparing a young man who will some day make some other girl very happy:)

Discipline

2008-07-30T13:24:00.001-07:00

I spend a lot of my time working with little kids (which I love!). That has been especially true this summer as I help out a family from church with three little girls. One thing I've been reminded of is that when you work with little children you are faced with a constant battle with sinful human nature. If you are serious about training and discipling these little ones you have to be constantly on guard, constantly ready to help them fight back sin and to turn them to Christ. You have to be prepared to stop whatever you are doing and spend ten...fifteen..twenty minutes talking to them, helping them to understand the sin in their own heart, pointing them to the cross, praying with them, and teaching them the way that is honoring to their Father. It's a full time job. However, I've been thinking that my own life is not that different. While it may not be as obvious (my sins usually aren't slapping my sister or refusing to share a toy:)), I face the same thing. I am in a constant battle-and I'm not even talking about the external spiritual battle. I face a constant battle within my own heart, against my own sinful nature. And that's why I've been thinking a lot about discipline lately. It takes discipline to battle back the darkness in my heart and submit to the work of Christ. It takes discipline to be faithful and obedient even in the small things that no one will ever find out about. By the abundant grace of God I need to be disciplined physically and spiritually. I need to discipline my mind and especially my heart. Because I am in a war.

Thoughts on Children's Ministry

2008-07-28T10:19:00.000-07:00

I have a lot of things whirling around in my head, but I don't feel like they have much form and order. Hopefully, these next few posts won't be too scattered. One of the things I've been thinking about is Children Ministry. We just hired a new head of our Children's Ministry and moving into the new building we're restructuring the ministry. Thus, I've been thinking about it quite a bit. My main feeling on "Children's Church" is that we should just get rid of it. After being involved in children's ministry (either as a participant or leader) for probably 18 years I don't think that children's church is very good for anyone.

Those children who come from homes where they aren't being faithfully discipled may learn some things, but without more reinforcement truth rarely takes root. Instead, coming to children's church becomes a time for them to hang out with their friends and goof off. But I don't think it's much better for those children who do come from homes where they are being discipled. At best the time in children's church is neutral. They've most likely learned much of what is being taught, but it could be good reinforcement. However, looking back at my own experience as a child, I think that the more common result of children's church in these kids hearts is pride. When I was in Children's Church I knew all the answers (and was usually the only one who would provide them). I thought I was quite impressive. I was so knowledgeable. I loved the attention of being the one to know all the answers. While I wouldn't want to assume that all children in such situations are as prone to give in to pride as I was, I do think that is a very real danger.

None of this is to say that nothing good has ever come out of Children's Church. The Holy Spirit works in mighty ways and uses even the most flawed tools to reach out and touch people. However, as a general rule, I've seen limited fruit coming from this form of Children's Ministry. I think that if we invested a quarter of the energy in training parents to train their children, we would probably get five times the results. I would really be ok with out any form of Children's Church. However, that's not an option in a church like ours. And so I'm left with this question-how do we do children's ministry in a way that will bear fruit, that will disciple children, that will fill them with a real love of Christ and scripture?

I'm not really sure. Right now I have a lot more concerns than I have solutions for them. I'm concerned that in trying to make our message exciting, entertaining, and hip we are training our children to treat scripture like they do the latest video game-cool as long as it keeps them entertained, but something to be thrown out once the novelty has worn off. I'm afraid that we're training them to only listen to scripture if its packaged in all that is cool and techno-savvy. Giving them a love of bells and whistles (even with a scripture verse inside) isn't going to last long when they get home and the Bible on their nightstand doesn't come with technicolor lights and upbeat music. I don't think there is anything wrong with showing the kids that Bible is living and exciting-it is. But I think the Bible is exciting in and of itself. It doesn't need a theme song and a candy bar to make it cool or relevant.

Scripture has a lot to say on child training. Of course, all these instructions are aimed at parents, but shouldn't we be using the same principles in children's church? One thing that sticks out to me is that biblical child training relies on the trainer having the disciple's heart. I don't think we're going to make any real progress with these kids unless we have a real relationship with them. Beyond that there seems to be one tool that God gives us that would be most effective in children's church/Sunday school setting- talk to them. Over and over God commands His people to talk to their children about Him and His commands. I think that only when we talk to them from the place of a real relationship can we hope to see an abundance of lasting fruit in these children. But I still don't really know what exactly that looks like in a children's church class room. Any ideas?

A History of Darrah and Missions pt3-What I learned in Central Asia

2008-07-24T13:17:00.000-07:00

When I got home from Central Asia I wrote down seven words that summed up what God taught me in my own walk while I was overseas. Like I said in my last post, none of these were necessarily dramatically new revelations, but were rather continuations and confirmations of things I was learning and home or reminders of things I needed to remember. I thought I'd share with you those words I wrote down and some thoughts on each of them:

~Sovereignty: This is something I'm reminded of every time I go overseas-that God is sovereign. It is so amazing to see his work on the other side of the world and to be reminded that He is in control of building His kingdom and that He is doing it in His own way and His own time. I'm really unnecessary to the work and yet God gives me the amazing privilege of sharing in it. Yet in the end it is all up to Him and therefore He receives all the glory.

~Intentionality: When you are somewhere for only two weeks you want to make the most of the time you are there. That means you try to be very intentional about everything you do. One of my team members said while we were there that it is easy to get into spiritual conversations as long as you are actively looking for opportunities. I want to be someone who makes the most of every opportunity-wherever I am.

~Provision: This is something God had been teaching me before I left for Central Asia and something He continues to work with me on. God provides all that we need for life and godliness. I need to rely on His provision and His strength to walk in obedience. Areas where I feel inadequate are actually opportunities where His strength can be made perfect in my weakness.

~Holiness: I was reminded of God's call to His people to high levels of holiness. The command is clear-be holy in all you do. We are told to avoid even a hint of ungodliness. Our holiness shows forth the worth of our Savior. If He is truly worthy how can we compromise on any of His commands? I was also reminded how important our holiness is in being a light and a witness to those around us. When the world looks at me, what do they see? Am living a life that is set apart for the Lord or do I live just like the world does?

~Purity: The country we went to is a very promiscuous country. Immodest dress for girls is even worse than it is here. My heart broke for those girls and I ached to show them a picture of what pure womanhood can look like. However, even as I wanted to do so I was painfully aware of how often I compromise my own purity. True, my compromises are usually internal, or so small that I doubt anyone else would ever notice, but God does. Real purity can only come from a pure heart and I must constantly rely on Christ and actively guard my heart so that I can live out of true purity and be a picture to the world of the sanctified bride of Christ.

~Discipline: This one connects back with some of the other lessons I was learning. In order to be intentional, holy, and pure I must be disciplined. Such things don't just happen accidentally. I am called to prepare my mind for action, to be always alert, to be disciplined and faithful in my pursuit of my Lord and obedience to Him.

~Confidence: This trip God taught me a lot about resting confidently in Him, about rooting my identity in Him, and about not fearing man. While I had a lot of "head knowledge" about this before, this trip allowed it to sink into my heart. Coming back I feel like I've made some headway on living in moment-by-moment dependence on Him and confidence in who He has created me to be (some headway, I still have a long ways to go).

Praise be to God who has promised to sanctify His children and mold them into His image!

A History of Darrah and Missions pt 2: going to Central Asia

2008-07-23T14:15:00.000-07:00

When I was first presented with the opportunity to go to Central Asia, my initial response was, "God, I really don't want to." Part of this came from the feeling I had coming back from Africa that short term trips weren't what I was supposed to be spending my time on. But most of it was that I really didn't want to go. I was tired, I was sick of traveling, and I really wanted to stay home. However, since none of these seemed like good enough reasons to say no, I figured I should think and pray about it. So my parents and I did just that. We all agreed that it seemed like I should go on this trip. Yet even after deciding to go, I wasn't very excited about it. I struggled with not wanting to go up until just before leaving to the trip. Yet even as I was reluctant to go, God began to teach me things and grow me as we prepared for the trip. Ironically, most of these things didn't really have anything to do with missions. Yet I was still unsure about why God was calling me to this trip. After all, I don't like short term missions trips. I'm not even sure I agree with short term missions trips. Even as we flew over the ocean and arrived in Central Asia I wasn't sure why I was there.

But now I am so glad that I went. The trip wasn't super dramatic or life-changing for me (though God certainly taught me thing, which will be another post). It was simply a time of living out Christianity on the other side of the world. But that was what made it so good. God worked in our time there in some amazing ways, but as I look back on the trip what I remember most is simply walking with Christ and with His people, trying to live out the gospel in a real way. And that's not so different from what life should be like here. Looking back, here are some things that I am thankful for:

~The people I went on this trip with. This trip (both leading up to it and on the actual trip) provided me the opportunity to grow closer to people I already counted as my friends. I am so grateful for the depth of friendship that God has blessed me with as a result of this trip. On other trips I've gone on in the past, I've made an idol out of relationships with other team members. I chose to go on trips solely motivated by a desire to be connected with a team, to feel like I belonged somewhere and was wanted. This trip, those factors weren't a motivator in my going. But as is so often the case, when I let go of that, God gave me exactly what I'd been looking for.

~The opportunity to come along side the full time workers in Central Asia. It was a blessing to me to be able to observe their life, especially the one young family on the field there. I enjoyed watching a young wife and homemaker with her two young children and seeing how life as a wife and mother, while there are certainly distinctions, isn't all that different no matter where you are in the world.

~The knowledge as I came back that God has placed me in Centennial, Colorado with my specific family to build His kingdom here. Yet, I also realize that I may not be placed here forever. Whether it is somewhere else in the US, or overseas, the day will probably come when God will call me (most likely through my future husband) to somewhere else. While in Central Asia I was faced with that thought-could I live here? And I'm thankful that I could-because anywhere God is, I can be there too.

~The knowledge that no matter where you are in the world, life-especially Christian life-isn't all that different. Sure there are cultural differences and different circumstances, but the really important things in life never change. God is God there as He is here. God is working there as He is here. God calls me to obedience there as He does here. God calls His children to love their families there as He does here. God calls His children to build His kingdom there as He does here.

Those are some things I'm thankful for regarding the trip. Next post I'll write about some things I learned while in Central Asia.

The Faith of Sarah

2008-07-21T11:59:00.000-07:00

I'm reading a book right now about the faith of Abraham. There is a reason Abraham is the father of those who walk by faith. The depth of his faith (despite the times it wavered)is amazing. However, lately I've been thinking about the faith of Sarah. While Sarah is commended in the New Testament, she is often overlooked in modern evangelical circles-probably because her brand of faith isn't very popular. You see Sarah had a deep faith (though like her husband it had moments of weakness), but her faith was in some ways different, and perhaps more difficult, than the faith of Abraham. You see Abraham left his home and family after hearing the voice of God tell him to. Sarah left her home and family after hearing the voice of her husband telling her to. She didn't hear the word directly. She had no guarantee that this call actually was from God and that her husband wasn't crazy. She simply had to trust and follow. That takes great faith. That is why Sarah is held up as an example to all believing women. This is the same faith exhibited by Mary. While Mary had the privilege of hearing directly from God's messenger that she would bear the Messiah, further instructions came to her husband. Perhaps it would have been even more difficult for her, having once heard the call of God directly, to then have to hear it through her husband. But when Joseph woke Mary up in the middle of the night and said, "we have to leave for Egypt," we have no indication that Mary hesitated or balked or complained. Instead she followed. This is faith: the faith that follows her head wherever he goes, trusting that in following her earthly lord, she is following her Heavenly Lord.

Kingdom Building in the Ordinary

2008-07-16T10:38:00.000-07:00

A few years ago I went through a time of frustration in my spiritual walk. I wanted my life to count for eternity. I didn't want to waste it. But I struggled with what that meant. After all, what really will last for eternity? So I started with the basics. I knew God's Word would last for eternity, and time spent in the word was not wasted. However, I still struggled because I would have all eternity to understand the word of God-what was the point of studying now? Shouldn't I be focusing on the things that I couldn't spend all eternity doing? And so I though about evangelizing. After all, people don't get saved in heaven. It seemed to me that this was what I would have to spend my life doing. It seemed like the only thing that really had any purpose. However, I soon grew frustrated again. After all, it was completely impossible for me to simply spend all my time evangelizing. I had to do school work and chores, I had little sisters who wanted my to play with them, I had to eat and sleep. All of these things seemed supremely purposeless. Because of this, I began to grow frustrated with God. After all, He had created the world in such a way that I couldn't spend all my time on that which (in my mind, at the time) mattered for eternity. Why on earth would He place us in such a predicament-commanding us to redeem the time and then requiring us to all sorts of ordinary living things? Verses that talked about glorifying God by eating and drinking didn't make a whole lot of sense to me.

Then, I discovered something that changed my whole perspective on life. I discovered that Jesus Christ is ruling right now to bring everything under His authority, that He is reconciling all things to Himself. That means He is sovereign over all the ordinary details of life. For some reason, God has chosen to build His kingdom slowly, rather than instantly. He has chosen to build His eternal kingdom here, in this imperfect world. He has chosen to use the everyday, ordinary events of life to proclaim His glory, His sovereignty, His lordship. About this same time I also began to really think about what it means to bear the image of God. This is what we were created to do. Everything I do should be a reflection of the work of the Father. And if God did not despise to make the smallest things of this world a picture of His glory and character, then what right have I to despise glorifying God in the smallest details of life? Any reflection of the work of God, no matter how small, is a part of building the kingdom and therefore will last for eternity.

When I began to realize this, my view on life changed. Rather than much of my life seeming meaningless, everything I did was filled with purpose. When I washed the dishes I was painting a small picture of how Christ washes us clean from our sin. When I played with my little sister, I was showing the love of God and His delight in His children. When I studied I was taking every thought captive to Christ. All these were acts of obedience, all of these displayed God's glory, all of these proclaimed the sovereignty of God. All of these matter. When everything you do is connected to Christ, life is exciting-the big things andthe little thing.

I don't do this perfectly. I still sometimes forget that when I water the garden and do my finances and set the table that I do it all to the glory of God. I still go through times when I struggle with feeling like life is meaningless. But I can always come back to glorious truth that if it was not a waste of time for Christ to spend 25 years as an ordinary carpenter, then it is no waste of time for me to be faithful where God has placed me. And when I remember that all my life is an act of kingdom-building, it fills me with such joy and gratitude that the God of the universe would allow me-sinful, fallen, broken-to be a part of the work of eternity, the great story that has been unfolding since before the dawn of creation.

Commands vs. Principles

2008-07-14T15:51:00.000-07:00

The Bible has a lot to say about a lot of subjects. It says the things it has to say in many different ways. As an English Literature major I can attest to the fact that the Bible is an amazing piece of literature (ok, one doesn't need to be an English Lit major to figure that out, but I need to use my degree in some way, right:)). God didn't just write to us, He wrote to us well. But the diversity of Scripture isn't just found in the differing styles, genres, and authors of the Bible; it is also found in the way God communicates to us that which He desires. There are some areas of life where God gives His children commands and there are others where He gives them principles. Commands are quite black and white. "You shall not murder" and "you shall not commit adultery" don't leave us with much wiggle room (even if some people try to find it). Commands of God must be obeyed and when we don't obey them we sin. However, God has not only given us instruction for life through commands, He also given us principles to guide our lives. Things get a little bit more sticky when we deal with principles, because rather than being faced with two options, one right and one wrong, the spectrum of how to apply the principle is, in many cases, endless. For instance, I believe modesty is a Biblical principle. However, the Bible doesn't give us a dress code. There is no question of this is the right thing to wear and this is the wrong thing to wear. There are probably thousands of ways one could honor God by dressing modestly. However, there are also thousands of ways one can dishonor God by not following this principle. And there is a spectrum of how we can apply these principles. Some of these ways are more Biblical than others.

This distinction is important to keep in mind, especially when discussing controversial topics. Just because someone doesn't apply the principle the same way I might, doesn't mean he is sinning. However, that also doesn't mean that all applications of a principle are necessarily equal. We are called to strive after the most Biblical, God-honoring life we can, ever seeking to become more conformed to His image (which is, after all, the direction of both the commands and principles we are given). Of course, we also live in a fallen world where none of us can live perfectly according to His principles. But each of us has the responsibility to look at his own life, heart, and circumstances and truly seek to apply God -given principles as best he can.

These are just some background thoughts before moving ahead. If we come to a point on which we disagree, please note that this does not mean I think you are sinning (unless of course, you don't have a problem with murder:)). Rather, I am striving to be faithful to what God has taught me, to not fear the disagreements that will arise, and to have the love and grace to continue on with those with whom I disagree. Solo Deo Gloria.

Preparing for Marriage

2008-07-08T09:15:00.000-07:00

Allow me to introduce you to an allegorical young woman named Miriam. Miriam is a violin player and at the age of fourteen she received a very special invitation. On the expensive looking paper, printed in beautiful calligraphy, were the following words: "You are cordially invited to play your violin before the president of the United States in six years time." Now, of course, Miriam was quite excited, and yet how should she respond? She has three basic options:

1. Miriam could get very excited and nervous and start thinking about it and planning the day. she could imagine what she would wear and what songs she would play and how impressed the president would be with her musical skill. However, if she spent the six years daydreaming about playing for the president, she would come before the president unprepared.
2. Miriam could think to herself: "Six years is so far away. And there's a good chance it may not happen. After all, in six years we'll have a different president. I'd better not waste my time preparing for something that might not happen. Besides I'm already a pretty good violin player and I can always practice when it gets closer." And so she could spend the next six years not letting violin get in the way of the things she really wanted to do. But, before she knows it, she is standing before the president unprepared.
3. Or Miriam could realize the honor of receiving the invitation and seek to prepare herself accordingly. Instead of spending all her time daydreaming about the moment or on other things that weren't important to becoming a better violinist, she would spend those six years practicing so that she might truly play her very best to honor the president.

When it comes to preparing for marriage, and preparing our children for marriage, we have much the same options. Some believers want to get married and are excited about the prospect, but instead of preparing themselves to be godly wives or husbands, they spend there time daydreaming about the wedding and how blissful married life will be. This is especially a temptation for young women. However, this approach will most likely only make our marriage experiences worse since not only will we not be prepared, we will also have unrealistic expectations. Realizing the foolishness of this option, many believers move to the second option.

I think that most of the broad evangelical church falls into the second category...that of not really doing anything to prepare themselves or their children for marriage. While most parents have a vague idea that their children will get married some day, most are very unintentional in preparing them for that. It seems like such a long way away. There are so many other things to do when your "independent." Marriage won't be that hard for them to figure out. But then we have a generation of believers who are unprepared for marriage, if they ever make it there.

The third option is what I believe we should be aiming for as believers: a preparation for marriage that is rooted in reality and discipline, not daydreams. We need to prepare ourselves and our children to take up the role of a godly husband or wife, realizing the honor and importance of these roles.

There is one more objection to answer. It was brought up in scenario two: what if marriage never happens. What if this child is called to singleness? First, the calling to celibacy is a rare calling. Second, the preparation for marriage will not be wasted. Had Miriam, at the end of six years of hard practice, not been able to play for the president that would not mean that those six years were wasted. She would still be an excellent violinist. Those skills would just be used in a different setting. The same is true for marriage. After all, the qualifications for being a godly husband or wife are the same qualifications for being a godly man or woman. Preparing for marriage means preparing to lead or to submit, to die to self, to honor another above yourself, to walk in discipline and responsibility. None of these qualities is ever wasted.

A History of Darrah and Missions pt 1

2008-07-05T10:13:00.000-07:00

When I was younger-probably starting around seven or eight-I wanted to be a missionary. Actually, to be more accurate, I was obsessed with being a missionary. Mother Theresa and Amy Carmichael were my heroes and I was sure I was going to go to India. For years I made Indian food, wrapped sheets around me for a sari, and learned to write my name in Hindi (no easy task for a ten year old when Hindi has a completely different alphabet). Not only that, but I had all my plans drawn up for the little mission house I was going to run-room for a school on the first floor and a hospital on the second (after all, I was going to help everyone). In my young mind I had it all figured out. It sounds like such passion from a young age could be a great prelude to a life dedicated to God on the foreign mission field, right? There's only one problem. My passion for missions didn't really have anything to do with God. Of course, if you had asked, I would have said I wanted to tell people about Jesus, but my real motivation for all these ambitious plans was pride. I was going to save the world all by myself. I, after all, was a noble child. While all my friends were interested in the latest toys I (because of my great superiority) wanted to repudiate all that and take a vow of poverty.

As I grew older, God began to work in my heart and slowly I came to realize that my motivations for going into foreign missions weren't very pure or honoring to Him. In High School I went on a mission trip to Mexico and then to two in the US. Slowly, I began to realize that maybe missions wasn't all I had thought it was-a path to adventure and a life that would be exciting and independent (the whole independent part is a topic for another post:)). Slowly, God weaned my heart off of a desire for foreign missions and made me excited about building the kingdom of God right here in America. One of the means He used to complete this work in my heart was a trip I took to Africa three and a half years ago. I went on the trip for a lot of wrong reasons (which I won't go into right now), but God used it to show my my place in His kingdom. The biggest lesson I learned while In Africa was that God didn't need me there. There was a vibrant church who was doing a far better job of spreading the kingdom in Africa than most US churches do in America. That's not say that there was no need for help in Africa (after all we all need help in some way), but I was sure that I wasn't the one to be given it. It was amazing for my to see how God had placed His servants all the way across an ocean and the equator to do His work there. But it was equally important for me to see that God had placed me in my home country for a reason, to build His kingdom there-in Centennial, Colorado.

After the Africa trip I didn't go overseas or on other mission trips for three and a half years. That was ok with me. I knew where I belonged and the work I had to do. I didn't miss traveling or being on the other side of the world or going on mission trips-even though most people around me expected me to be "hooked" on going over seas. I was content serving God and building His kingdom here. Then a dear friend of mine called and said..."do you want to go to Central Asia?" But that will be the subject for another post:)

Why I am starting a blog

2008-07-02T09:06:00.000-07:00

As some of you may know, I started a blog last summer to chronicle our seven week adventure across the United States. When we got back from this journey, my blog kind of died. However, I've decided to start a new blog (obviously:)). My goal is to be more regular in posting to this blog. This isn't a "what's going on in my life" blog, but rather a blog to chronicle my thoughts and ideas. I'm starting this blog for two main reasons:

1. God has really been working in my life lately to move me past a fear of man. I hate conflict and this usually leads me to not say what I actually think, to let people think I agree with them when I don't, and to generally not communicate what I actually think and believe. God has been convicting me that I need to be faithful to Him and to what He has taught me whether or not the people around me agree with me. Therefore, in this blog I'm attempting to be as honest as possible, no matter how controversial the subject might be. While I realize that if my growth in being honest in these areas is limited only to the Internet I probably won't have learned very much, but I also think that this blog can be a good place to start being faithful. So, that is the first reason: that I might practice speaking (or typing:)) the truth in love.

2. Since I'm done school my main outlet for writing has been cut off. So this blog is a way for me to not grow rusty in my writing skills and to continue doing something I enjoy.